Cellporn
11-21-10 | 11:47 a.m.
Friday night we went to the bar. Heading out to the men's club my husband belongs to for a few drinks and some pool is my personal proof that I've finally arrived on the other side of mommy-hood.
It's mommy's turn to have fun now that the youngest is old enough to do his own thang.
My favorite thing about this place is that it's mainly people my age....the little kids tend to not wanna hang around with a bunch of 40-somethings.
AWESOME.
I fucking hate kids.
The other most awesome thing in the world is when there are a minimum of other women at the bar. I prefer the company of men in general.
I fucking hate women.
There are exceptions to both of those hate-rules, but generally they stand. Brats and bitches is where I draw the line.
The regular bartender Joe knows us since I am now a lush of sorts and find myself there a few times a week. Joe is a pervert and a flirt and he somehow pulls that off while still sporting a Michael Bolton rat-tail. It seems counter to everything that I would allow to be a blip on my radar, but somehow, I like Joe.
Let's call him a kindred freak.
After shooting some sweet pool and handing a few asses over to their owners, we sat back at the bar.
I don't know who started buying us shots, but who cares? I drank a bunch of them.
Joe...who always wants to know pressing things like, "Does your friend ever fuck on the side?" and "Is that girl you were in here with the other day your lover?" and one of my favorites "Did you know that when you shoot pool, you hold the cue like no other women I've ever seen?"....asks me if I can watch YouPorn on my phone.
Well, duh, why do you think I wanted an Android?
So I cue up a nice juicy lesbian scene since I know Joe loves wondering if I hook up with women and show him my phone. He smiles...take a step back and looks at my husband.
Hubby just smiles right back.
Joe shakes his head as if in disbelief and then says, "You are by far the coolest fucking girl I've ever met."
Yes! Me and Joan Jett. Coolest chicks in the world.
I put the cool in ejacoolation - 08-17-14
STFU - 09-08-12
Be careful, people - 07-17-12
bow chicka bow wow - 07-03-12
Phoning it in - 07-01-12
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